God is Good

My heart and spirit are filled, overflowing, with so much love right now. I’m not sure what this post will turn out to be, I just know I had this overwhelming feeling to write down what has been on my mind for the last week and a half. As I am sitting here just making a mental list of all the things I want to say, my eyes fill with tears because God is so good. He is good. Underlined, bold, italicized. Because I never want to forget that, and I know I will sometimes, but Lord, I pray that I am always reminded of it when I do. 

I’ve been given the amazing blessing of working with a youth ministry summer camp this year. It’s a ministry for inner-city kids K-8^th and I’m with the k-3^rd girls. One of the main things we talked about in our staff training last week was how everything is about the kids. We can’t be selfish, we must think of them. Maybe it’s 95 degrees and we want to swim, but they want to go to the park? We are going to the park. It’s all good and true, but dang. Dang, this summer has already weighed down on my heart, already blessed me in so many ways. It’s all about the kids, but that doesn't prevent it from having a positive impact on the counselors too. 

During our staff training week, I was convicted each day by our lectures, discussions, and exercises. I was excited for camp to start, to be able to minister to these young minds. But honestly, I was extremely intimidated and nervous too. It’s a big and important responsibility. For many of these children, the scripture we read to them may be the only scripture they hear in their entire lives. There was one line in particular that kept coming to my mind and continues each camp day. It was something along the lines of “The seeds we plant this summer may be the only seeds ever planted in their lives. They might not grow for years. But we are here to plant seeds, and pray for God to water them.” In addition, we might be the only ones in their lives to show them love, care, patience, forgiveness, attention, encouragement, etc. each day. Many of them come from very broken homes and troubled backgrounds. That reminds me of another line that has stuck with me, “We aren’t just counselors, we are mothers, fathers, friends, and protectors.” We aren’t here to babysit kids, we are here to build loving, caring, and glorifying relationships in a broken community. 

By the end of training week, I was feeling so spiritually full and ready to go into the first week of camp. Then the weekend happened. Let’s just say, it was not a good weekend for me. Friday night and Saturday were both full of tears. Tears from stress and difficult decisions. Saturday night, I thought everything was good. Everything was settled and lookin up. Nope. Received some very surprising and upsetting news on Sunday morning. Instead of walking downstairs and wishing my father a Happy Father’s Days, I walked straight into his arms crying. More crying, ugh, it just never ends sometimes. A few hours later, I was filled with an overwhelming sensation of peace and assurance that could only come from God. Everything was going to be okay. Although I am unsure how things will work out, I know they will. Things will be tough this Fall, but I will figure it out and not be discouraged, for I know He has a plan for me.

Although I was feeling better, I still went into Monday with about mid-level spirits. I wasn’t sure how the day would go, I felt kind of off from my crazy weekend. But it was flawless. I have only been with these girls for 3 days, but they have already moved me in so many ways. My co-counselors and I have been blessed with such sweet, loving girls. They are so encouraging to one another and work so hard to do their best at everything we do. Each day I wonder if they will understand the devotions or be able to complete different activities without being discouraged. And they continue to amaze me. On the bus I overhear them practicing the memory verse together. They are constantly asking me to test them, and almost all of them already has it down. The summer theme is fruits of the Spirit. Every day they make the connection between our activities before we can even finish explaining it. Everyday they challenge me to be better because I want to be my best for them. 

Tonight, at the girl counselor’s Bible study, one of my friends brought up a wonderful connection to our work, and our every day lives, to John 17:4

“For I have glorified You on the earth. I have finished the work which You have given Me to do."

How amazing it would be to be able to honestly say this to God when we meet Him. To glorify God in everything we do and to complete everything He has called us to do. But this isn’t just a long-term goal, we should also be able to say this at the end of each day. The end of each day. I want to be able to say this at the end of each day working with these children. I want to be able to glorify God and answer His calling each day of my life.